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Parenting adult children poses a myriad of challenges, but doing so from thousands of miles away adds a whole different dimension.
Maintaining a strong relationship with your child while giving and receiving the support that you both need from time to time takes extra effort and an embrace of technology, but the rewards are boundless.
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Seeing her apartment, her neighborhood and meeting some of her closest friends made it possible for me to visualize her daily life, bringing to life what she would regularly describe to me through our digital screens.
Exploring Shanghai for myself gave me a much greater appreciation of the joys and challenges Sarah faces daily in her life there, creating an appetite for further exploration of a part of the world I might never have visited on my own.
Trying to understand the country she calls home has become an integral part of my life.
I monitor the news about our country’s relationship with China, keeping the information for our country’s embassy and consulate close at hand.
While she has formed her own sense of family living in Shanghai, our nuclear family puts in extra effort to maintain and strengthen our family unit despite the distance, and that requires asking for what you need.
Sarah’s commitment to come home for the holidays requires real sacrifice on her part, but it means the world to me and to the rest of our small family, and from what I understand, it’s one she’s happy to make.
It felt like she was abandoning me just when I most wanted to keep her close. C., but all of our prior conversations had focused around a few cities in the United States.
She didn’t speak a word of Mandarin or Cantonese and talking about moving halfway around the world to live in a country with a totally different culture and political system left me feeling anxious, alone, but also a little jealous. We went through a lot together in the early months after her father died and I was desperately afraid of losing the close connection that so sustained me.
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