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"Many of these men who are 60 are going for 35-year-olds," Dede told me. (Greene had been killed by a gunman in August in Kabul.)After about a week of communicating, Mark announced that he was being sent back to Afghanistan but would have access to the Internet there.
"That just turns me off."Dede sent Mark a note through Match's messaging system. We got to the point where it was bantering and chattering back and forth."Dede wrote about the horse she owned and about plans for her father's birthday. He said he was in the Army and had recently accompanied the body of Maj. Mark sent photos, including some of him in uniform.
Single women can find him on the dating site Date Me Mate Me.com, where he confesses to being "Very new to this dating thing and am looking to see where this takes me." At Fish Meet Fish.com, under the username Real Chandler, he explains, "I would love my first date to be something special."At Girls Datefor Free.com, Chandler describes himself as being 6-2 and weighing 158 pounds.
The man with whom Dede thought she was corresponding — he of the salt-and-pepper hair and friendly smile — was closer than she knew.
He worked at the Pentagon, where he was the Army's top enlisted soldier.
Well, give me your address, Mark said, so I can find a hotel near you.
During one of their Yahoo Messenger chats not long before he was due to return, Mark raised something a bit odd.
Photos such as this one from are copied and used in online false identity scams. Photos of senior Army leaders are so popular that the Army's public affairs office monitors misuse. We spend a lot of time searching for The One, the person who will love us as much as we love him or her. She works in an industry that employs mainly women. Dede is looking for love in what researchers call a "thin market." That, as a 2012 paper on online dating in the American Sociological Review put it, is "when the cost of identifying multiple potential partners who meet minimum criteria may be large enough to present a barrier to relationship formation."Dede joked that she'll have to pin her relationship hopes on a retirement community.
of the Army Raymond Chandler serves up an omelet he just made to a wounded warrior at Fort Sam Houston in Texas in 2011. Army)WASHINGTON — All together now: All you need is love. It seems like such a simple recommendation, and yet it can be awfully hard to find this essential component of a happy and fulfilling life.
Dede let her membership lapse and then rejoined last summer.
Again, nothing seemed to click, but as her subscription was about to expire, Dede extended the geographic range of her searches.
"He just said the insurance was going to cost ,000 and he didn't have it. I'm sorry I can't help you.' Then he just dropped it."A red flag? — Mark." Later, he called her, but the phone connection was so staticky that Dede hung up. He promised to pay her back."That's when I knew it was a scam," she said. "He emailed me for five months before he asked for anything," Dede said.
To Dede, it was more like a pink one."He didn't press me for it," she told me. That's when the chocolate and flowers came."Mark sent a dozen and a half red roses and a box of candy to Dede's home. In his next text message to Dede, Mark said he had found most of the money to ship the box (it supposedly contained diamonds). She assumes he was stringing along multiple women, each at a different part of the seduction.
In January, Mark wrote Dede that he was coming home and even sent a PDF file detailing his itinerary.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating