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It doesn’t matter how passionate the sex with the ‘other man’ in her life is, she is not leaving her husband.

Usually at the beginning of such an arrangement, when the triangle is young so to speak, the ‘other man’ usually tells himself he likes this arrangement because he doesn’t have to make a commitment.

Personally, I think most if not all married people know on some level if a spouse is cheating, but that’s just my belief.

Anyway, the married man like his supposed competition is afraid of a deeper intimacy as well. His willingness to live in a limited marital relationship thinly disguises this fear of deeper love and intimacy.

By the way, when people say they are afraid of intimacy think ‘exposure’ to what they themselves have difficulty accepting in themselves.

Most people I’ve met who are afraid of intimacy, lose the fear when they accept and feel better about themselves.

In some instances he ‘knows’ his wife is cheating on him and looks the other way.

In other instances his defenses are so thick he doesn’t read the signs at least consciously.

Then he can go after a whole and available single woman. He’s the ‘other man’s’ competition, but not really.

The important thing about the married man is he’s probably coping with his limited marriage by doing something else (work, alcohol, substances, whatever consumes and distracts him).

All three people in this triangular arrangement have their issues.

Let’s do one at a time starting with the ‘other man.’ He is definitely looking for love in the wrong place and with the wrong person.

The question is whether or not the married man will fix this intimacy issue with this wife.

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