Dating cheating man

"The affair helped me find myself and proved to me that I could live a life independent of my husband. Twenty-five years later, I'm married to a wonderful man.We love making each other happy, and never try to change who the other person is," she says.

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What You Can Learn: While what her husband did may be shocking, the fact that there was unaddressed anger in the relationship created fertile ground for an affair, says Dr. "Coupled with the lack of sexual intimacy there was nothing left to hang a relationship on," he says Even though the affair helped Vanessa learn some valuable lessons and the relationship was ultimately saved, Dr.

Silverman stresses the importance of open and honest communication in a relationship as a way for a couple to stay connected—before one of the spouses seeks comfort or intimacy outside of the marriage.

What You Can Learn: "Barbara felt alone for many years, and feeling disconnected from your partner is the genesis of most of the affairs I see in my practice," says Dr. "I was very angry, but I was also very hurt, because I felt like I wasn't enough for him—like there was something I wasn't doing for him as his wife, which is why he felt the need to go outside of our marriage," says the 33-year-old.

That jumble of mixed emotions was the impetus for her affair.

"My husband was a good man, but I was bored inside and out," she says.

"In our community, I always felt like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole." That year, she was in Chicago on business and met Bob, an Australian man, on an elevator. We exchanged numbers, kept in touch, and I decided to fly out to Australia to see him and get him out of my system," she says."That was 25 years ago and now I can say that my affair was the turning point in my life's journey.Today, Bob and I are married, own a winery in Australia, and have five children and 10 grandchildren between us." What You Can Learn: Though Barbara's story ended up with a "happily ever after," that's not always the case when it comes to infidelity, which is why Dr."I started to really love my job, and kids didn't seem to fit into the picture," she says.Her husband was hurt by her change of heart, and began to resent her."The biggest lesson I learned was that if I was unhappy in my marriage, my husband was only 50% to blame.

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